I’m a born worrier, always have been, and no doubt always will be! It’s a cliche, but I’d be worried if I didn’t have something to worry about! Just the way I’m wired I guess!
So naturally, I’ve always had ‘mind talk’, and most of the time it’s ok, my inner dialogue has been a part of me since I can remember, and for the most part she’s a familiar companion. But sometimes, my inner voice gets a little too big and bold for her boots and she pushes herself centre stage, rather than remaining in the wings…bl**dy show off!
The last time my mind talk really flared up was during my period of unemployment last year, I’d had a frustrating run of rejections, a couple of demoralising trips to the Job Centre, and Christmas was looming. My confidence took a nosedive and my inner voice went full diva!
So how did I deal with her? Well I chose to try and ignore her as best I could, giving the outward impression that all was well, the challenge of a budget Christmas would be rather fun, and well everyone gets a job eventually don’t they? Inner voice decided to leave me alone during the day, but she sashayed back to her leading lady status as soon as I tried to go to sleep, and she took her time disappearing each night too…little madam!
To be fair to her, inner voice has been pretty well behaved of late, but she must have thought she was long overdue an outing fairly recently, as once again she flounced back with a vengeance – and a right stroppy mare she was this time too!
A series of blips brought her out of hiding, and she made herself very comfortable once again! Now you’d have thought that as a newly qualified Mental Health First Aider, I’d now be well equipped to deal with her, and I knew I should be talking about how I was really feeling, but I didn’t.
Instead I reverted to my old pattern of behaviour and felt myself withdrawing and not communicating as I should be, and that’s how quickly things can escalate. And when your glass feels half empty, it’s hard to reach out for a top up!
But I’m lucky, I have a strong network around me, and a role that puts wellbeing as a necessary priority, not a lip-serviced luxury. And as quickly as inner voice appeared, she was soon sent packing and I hope she’s taken herself off for a really long holiday!
So why am I sharing the story of my mind talk? Why am I giving my inner voice yet more airtime? Well because we all have moments when we want to retreat from the world, even if we’re pretty resilient most of the time! And once we retreat, sometimes it’s tough to find the right road back.
It’s so important to talk.
If any of my story strikes a chord, then maybe this is for you.
I’m bringing inner voice with me, she might learn a thing or two!
See you there!
We think Sue must be a ‘Master of the Dark Arts’, as she has hidden depths! Running our office with meticulous planning and capability, Sue is an avid list writer with a keen eye for detail. But don’t be fooled by that organised demeanour, for Sue is as creative as she is efficient! A skilled communicator with a humorous edge, Sue is as passionate about people and their learning and development as she is about becoming the future Mrs Tom Hardy or Mrs Benedict Cumberbatch (either will do!). An interesting career path has taken her from the glamour of working in luxury London hotels to the chilled Distribution Centres of supermarket retail, and whether managing small groups or large teams, people are at the heart of everything Sue does.